refried dreams

Blue Murder

2009-06-18T01:01:00.002+01:00

Swamp Thing

2009-06-02T22:13:00.003+01:00

Just stuck this on eBay and decided that this Bernie Wrightson cover is one of my favorite bits of comic art. Thought I'd share.

Sunset Gun

2009-04-30T17:27:00.003+01:00

Further Tales of the Zombie

2009-04-04T18:29:00.003+01:00

The long awaited (by me at least) Renaissance is now out on the interweb. It's a bit crap, to be honest, but I'm only in the first bit, so you can skip the rest. 'Twas a laugh to do, though, and I got to be in TV Quick (above) and the rather more upmarket Guardian Guide (below).

Reckon I'm on screen for about 10 seconds max, which leaves me 14 minutes 50 seconds of fame left in my life.

Creative Mishearings

2009-03-09T23:57:00.005Z

Imagine my delight when the continuity person on TV announced an upcoming programme called 'Extreme Fisting With Robson Green'. On after the watershed, too; sounded promising. Imagine my disappointment when it turned out to be some crap about catching fish.

Made me wonder if anyone else among my huuuge readership had creatively misheard/misread something that made it sound significantly more interesting than it actually was...

But basically I just want some comments. Nobody's left one for months. Come on, you bastards, it's cold and lonely out here in Hackney.

Unknown Worlds

2009-02-09T01:36:00.005Z

Currently on eBay and not worth as much as they should be, considering this was some of the best stuff Marvel did at the time. But one thing you learn selling comics is that financial value bears absolutely no relation to the quality of the content. Possibly one of the best ever covers to adorn a comic courtesy of the great Mike Kaluta (above). Frank Brunner(below).

Groovy Books

2009-01-31T18:16:00.003Z

Currently on eBay, if y'all are interested.

Fog

2009-01-26T00:02:00.003Z

Squeak

2009-01-09T00:14:00.004Z

AKA El Nino-duderino. Recent addition to the Clan Duderino. Skills include: chasing stuff, eating, attacking stuff, shredding newspaper, eating, chasing more stuff, eating, pissing off Bat (below).

A GOOD COP IN A BAAD MOOD

2008-12-20T19:34:00.002Z

Thanks to Dom for the best birthday card this year. It's good to be reminded of what I looked like in my prime.

Hell Rider

2008-11-06T01:27:00.003Z

RIP Spike (2002-2008)

2008-10-09T01:19:00.001+01:00

Medusa

2008-09-27T15:33:00.002+01:00

National Dennis Wheatley Week

2008-09-24T00:20:00.003+01:00

"Oh my God, Ralph, look at the size of their... spears!"

Tales of the Zombie

2008-09-02T00:46:00.008+01:00

Just been doing some stuff for the next series of Moving Wallpaper, which is about the making of a zombie movie, and I got to do a lot of fun things like hang out with other zombies, terrorize Kelly Brook, rip the throat out of an air hostess, and get smashed in the face with a rubber fire extinguisher by Alan Dale (Jim from Neighbours). Definitely worth spending two hours a day in makeup and getting hassled by wasps all the time (it's the blood, you know -- made from Golden Syrup). Don't know when it's out, but I was in a bunch of promotional pics so look out for me in the Radio Times.

And I got to keep the contact lenses.

Self-Portraits

2008-07-31T00:36:00.003+01:00

Dom made me do this:

SE7EN

2008-06-04T01:58:00.003+01:00

Kek made me do this:
"List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they’re not any good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying now, shaping your spring. Post these instructions in your blog along with your 7 songs. Then tag 7 other people to see what they’re listening to."

So here we go:

Mekons: 'Ghosts Of American Astronauts'. Remember loving this when Dom & I saw them supporting Pere Ubu yonks ago. Then completely forgot about it for 20 years before stumbling over it as a download somewhere. Just lovely.
Girls Aloud: 'I Can't Speak French'. They keep playing this at my gym. I can't bench press, so I let the funky music do the talking talking uh uh uhhh...
Nine Inch Nails: 'The Four Of Us Are Dying'. Off the so-so new album. He should stick to instrumentals like this and spare us his whiney lyrics.
Nico: 'All Tomorrow's Parties'. Not the Velvets version, but an 8 minute live solo version in which she at one point managed to completely mistime her entrance. You'd think she'd know it by heart. Probably on drugs.
David Bowie: 'Panic In Detriot'. Recently rediscovered what a great album 'Alladin Sane' is. I love Mike Garson's wonky piano stuff, which actually isn't on this track.
Ministry: 'Animosity'. Teeth-clenching head-smashing MURRDER!
The Cure: 'Bloodflowers'. Get drunk, turn the lights out and play this when you split up with your girlfriend. If I had a girlfriend I'd dump her just to appreciate the song better.

Afraid I can't nominate anyone else, as everyone I know has been done already!

Knifedancer

2008-04-16T23:20:00.001+01:00

Deviant Art

2008-03-15T19:34:00.004Z

Fans of my artwork (yes, both of you) might like to know I have a gallery at Deviant Art where I am putting up twisted stuff like this. The isn't a huge amount there at the moment but I'm adding stuff bit by bit. It's a good site - you can spend hours browsing and quite lose track of time.

The List

2008-01-29T23:12:00.000Z

Late, and in no particular order:

Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here. Always hated pompous post-'Meddle' Floyd, but last night I heard a band called Rasputina (2 cellos and drums) do a cover of it, and it was ace.
Steps - Tragedy.
Tight Fit - The Lion Sleeps Tonight. Where are they now?
Robbie Williams - No Regrets. I once got drunk and requested this in an Industrial Goth club.
Van Halen - Jump. Stadiums were built for songs like this. Or stadia.
Coldplay - God Put A Smile Upon Your Face. Chris Martin is the expert at writing profound sounding lyrics that mean sod all. Catchy tune, though.
Starsailor - Good Souls. As above. Even more earnest and miserable than Coldplay.
J. Geils Band - Centerfold.
Morrissey - First Of The Gang To Die. There, I did it! Even knowing that Dom and Kek will never talk to me again.
Pretty much anything by Rammstein, cos I love 'em. Best stage show I've ever seen, like a gay fetish Nuremberg Rally with flamethrowers.

Razorgirl

2008-01-20T16:42:00.000Z

Which I must admit to being quite pleased with, especially the pants and the hair. Not sure if the claws quite work though. Chrome is difficult. Expect more airbrush porn soon!

Wir Sind Helden - Guten Tag

2008-01-03T21:03:00.000Z

Just had to share, cos it's ace, despite being a blatant ripoff of Plastique Bertrand's 'Ca Plane Pour Moi'. I've heard an extended version which is even better.

Kane & Lynch

2007-12-12T01:31:00.000Z

Possibly the weirdest acting type job I ever had. Last week was flown all expenses paid to Turin, where I had to imitate a computer generated gun-wielding psychopath. Not, it must be said, the hardest work I ever did, as I'm inclined towards gun-wielding psychopath sort of stuff naturally. Anyway we just had to wander around this very posh Accademia, swearing a lot and threatening each other, and generally scaring the students, while some Italian academics droned on about artificial intelligence. Were taken for a meal by the very nice people from Eidos, and flew home the next day. Really trippy couple of days. The only thing we lacked were the guns, but it probably wasn't worth the hassle trying to get them through customs.

'Kane', by the way, is Doug. A proper actor, who's going to be in Torchwood in January.

Underwater Fluff

2007-11-28T15:48:00.000Z

Inspired by Dom's occasional series. But who is this submarine stunna?

Police Brutality

2007-11-08T18:37:00.000Z

Was just lately back in the same patch of woods where I was doing that Druidy stuff a while back, this time being beaten up by riot police. All for the sake of art I must say, or television anyway. It was for He Kills Coppers which is going to be on ITV sometime in the new year. The scene is a recreation of the famous Battle of the Beanfield, during which a bunch of crusties got the crap kicked out of them by the neo-facist puppets of the police state, sometimes known as Wiltshire Constabulary.

Anyway it was a fun enough couple of days, even though the two brutal Nazis (above, nice guys really) assigned to drag me off the bus and pin me on the ground took to their job with rather more enthusiasm than was necessary. And we had to do it 8 fucking times. I suffered for my art all right.

Below is a group of peace loving hippies outside our poorly decorated 'Love Bus', blissfully unaware of what is in store for them.

Smoke

2007-10-15T22:39:00.000+01:00

Being my first proper digital painting, rather than coloured scanned line-art which is what I was doing before, and I must say I'm rather pleased with it. The figure was based on a photo, though, which I suppose is cheating a bit.

Swamp Things - part 1

2007-09-26T01:38:00.000+01:00

A work in progress.

The trilogy complete

2007-09-12T01:30:00.000+01:00

At last the final episode, in which our heroes are attacked by a swarm of hostile alien butt-plugs. Here are the first two again, in case you'd forgotten them.

El Druderino

2007-09-03T23:08:00.000+01:00

Recently spent a couple of days running around in dank woods at Pinewood Studios pretending to be a Druid. no, I haven't joined some nutjob re-enactment society, it was for the upcoming Terry Pratchett thing on Sky, 'The Colour Of Magic'. The reason for the rather pained expression on my face is that fucking hessian was damned uncomfortable, not to mention damp and muddy.

Anyway I got to hold the lead actress' hand (leading her up to the altar to be sacrificed, in fact), and she told me I looked like Alan Rickman, which is a step up from Steven Seagal. Then I got chased around by and old guy with a sword. Getting up at 5am was the hard bit. That's when I'm usually going to sleep.

I don't have the benefit of Sky TV, and am really not into Pratchett's stuff anyway, but maybe someone can tape it for me who does. No idea when it's coming out, but they seem to be spending a bit of money on it, so I imagine they'll give it plenty of hype.

Some passing kids told my I looked like Wonder Woman. Little twats.

By the way - changing the subject - has anyone checked out the endless and totally paranoid rant someone's left as a comment on my Madame Hydra post below? It's the most bonkers thing I've read for ages, and I've only got about a fifth of the way through so far. I feel quite honoured to be chosen, really.

The Towers

2007-08-21T15:00:00.000+01:00

Buy This Shit

2007-08-08T01:38:00.000+01:00

Ebay has been a bit slow lately so I thought I'd follow Dom's lead and plug it here ( link at the side). Among the wonderous items I have listed is that thing above. Now I have really no idea how I came to own this -- I certainly didn't pay any money for it and it's not the kind of thing any of my ex-girlfriends would have left here. I just want it to go away. Please.

Only 99p, and it's her anniversary.

Go on, you know you want to.

Terror Totty Part 4: Madame Hydra

2007-07-14T18:28:00.001+01:00

AKA Viper - acquiring the name by killing the original Viper (who was the brother of the Eel).
Half of face hideously scarred, but still a hottie.
Looks good in tight outfit, especially when drawn by Steranko.
Went out with the Red Skull for a while.
Treats subordinates poorly.
Impossible to shut up once she starts off about world domination.
Yes, I have run out of ideas for this series.

Terror Totty Part 3: Gudrun Ensslin

2007-07-10T20:09:00.000+01:00

Nice well brought-up German girl, father a vicar.

Appeared in art-porn movie Das Abonnement (see pic).

Decided to hang out with similarly middle-class-war types Andreas Baader and Ulrike Meinhof and 'fight the system', as you do.

Burned some shops, and sprang her boyfriend from prison, as you do.

Found hanged in jail. Suicide or state execution? You decide!

Terror Totty Part2: Leila Khaled

2007-06-29T19:34:00.001+01:00

Looks great holding automatic weapon.
Killer cheekbones.
Blew up planes, or something.
Julian Cope wrote a song about her.
No known affiliation to Hydra.

Terror Totty Part 1: Tania

2007-06-26T01:57:00.001+01:00

AKA Patty Hearst
Looks cool holding automatic weapon
Married her bodyguard
Was in a John Waters film
Fully paid-up menber of Hydra! Er ... I meant the Symbionese Liberation Army
That's enough bullet-points

Hackney after the rain

2007-06-06T01:44:00.000+01:00

Save the cheerleader

2007-05-30T02:08:00.000+01:00

Have just finished a marathon viewing of the entire first series of Heroes, thanks to a friend who kindly and most illegally downloaded it, and I must say it is absolutely ace. The best TV I've seen since Firefly. 23 episodes and not one of them a dud. Unlike that tiresome toss Lost it actually has a story that knows where it's going from the first episode, engaging characters like brain-removing psycho Sylar (above), and some kick-ass action stuff.

What I like most about it is there are very few clear-cut goodies/baddies, with most of the cast starting out as one, changing to the other, and ending up somewhere in the middle. And it's not afraid to kill off major characters now and then. Okay some of the dialogue is a bit corny, but the plot moves along so quickly you hardly care, and it manages a cliffhanger at the end of nearly every episode. Also plenty of cool comics references to keep the geeks happy.

If you haven't seen it already make sure you check it out when it comes on BBC2. I just hope the fuckers don't butcher it like they did Buffy.

the eye of silence

2007-05-25T00:06:00.000+01:00

Devil Duck

2007-05-17T15:27:00.000+01:00

Another horny little devil

2007-05-14T20:19:00.000+01:00

Currently guarding my cacti. One day I'm going to meet a girl just like her. *sigh*

And while we're on the subject ...

2007-05-08T22:10:00.000+01:00

.... these rather lovely magnets currently adorn my fridge. That damn burning lake must have some ace merchandising.

"FLEE FROM THE WRATH TO COME!"

2007-05-05T15:18:00.000+01:00

More religious nuttery, as found in the pub. There was a whole buch of stuff about people who'd seen Heaven as well, but I didn't bother to include it - an awful lot of light, joy and meeting dead relatives. Just the sort of place I'd try to avoid. Hell sounds like much more fun. Burning lakes, and shit. How cool is that? I'll bet there's some groovy goth clubs as well. And if infidel like Voltaire and Thomas Paine are hanging out in them ... well I know where I want to go.

Unfinished building, Bishopsgate

2007-04-23T20:23:00.000+01:00

Killer Pussy

2007-04-17T23:06:00.000+01:00

Which has, er ... not much to do with cats, I think. Saw a preview on Japanorama last night, and rather desperately want to get a copy. There is a cool trailer here. One of a new wave of Japanese erotic splatter apparently, which sounds good to me.

Tell Me Easter's On Friday

2007-04-06T14:18:00.000+01:00

More apocalyptic literature put through my door by the local religious nuts. Cool pic, though.

Our Lady of Pain

2007-03-31T14:38:00.000+01:00

What's wrong with this picture?

2007-03-21T18:53:00.000Z

I walk past this every day, and it bugs the hell out of me. However you add it up, whatever obscure numerical system you might use, it's not 24 hours!

Lying bastards!

Actually it was open 24 hours in the beginning, then they realised the only people who went in at 4am were crackheads.

Nine Inch Nails

2007-03-13T15:52:00.000Z

Okay, you can call me the oldest teenager in town, but I thought they were one of the bands that you ought to see at least once before you die, like Ministry and Rammstein (actually I'd happily see Rammstein again - one of the best nights out I'd had for ages).

Now it must be admitted that our boy Trent hasn't made a good record since The Downward Spiral god knows how long ago, his lyrics are invariably cringeworthy 'O' level angst, and he's getting a little podgy ( he doesn't take his jacket off for the 2 hour set - a technique learnt I'd guess from Steven Seagal). But blimey - these chaps can rawk! And loud enough to actually hurt my ears, which I haven't experienced for a while.

They further endear themselves to me by mostly ignoring the last couple of albums for most of the set and hammering out the good old stuff, then kind of spoil it by doing some less than memorable new numbers and putting on a crowd-pleasing stadium-rock finale. Worst part of the night was the Coldplay moment of a couple of thousand idiots singing along to Hurt while waving their fucking phones in the air. The twats. Johnny Cash did it better, anyway. His version had some genuine emotion, while Reznor just sounds like a whiny goth teenager in need of a good slap.

Incidentally, my new camera phone does some very strange things in low light conditions. Here is Trent singing Hurt:

Which I quite like in an abstract kind of way.

My bedside tabe

2007-02-28T01:56:00.000Z

Just got a new phone off Orange and while testing the camera last night happened to take a still life of my entire existence in microcosm - apart from the porn and the comics. I keep all of life's essentials close to hand.

It's got an MP3 player, too.

The Mouth of Madness part 2 - electric airbrush remix

2007-02-20T18:40:00.000Z

Just recently bought a Wacom tablet and pen which makes doing stuff like this much easier than using a mouse. This was all done in Photoshop, but there's a groovy paint prog that came with the tablet that includes an incredibly realistic oil paint simulator. Look out for more twisted shit.

Deadly Reptiles

2007-02-15T02:42:00.000Z

Sky 3 , the last resort of the alcoholic insomniac, has such a programme on right now. It's educational. I have learned that "avoiding rattlesnakes is the clue to not letting them bite you", which might not have otherwise occurred to me.

The Mouth of Madness - part 1

2007-02-11T16:25:00.000Z

Snow

2007-02-08T15:04:00.000Z

Jesus on Mars

2007-02-04T15:01:00.000Z

My 15 inches of fame...

2007-01-30T00:03:00.000Z

It may or may not have come to your attention that I am in a porn film. I shit you not. This is it, actually "The Cockwell Inn", just out recently. I hasten to add that at no point did I actually get my kit off or do anything unhygenic. I was merely an extra in a couple of scenes playing a sad loner at the bar. Typecast again. Nor did I actually get paid anything, unless you count a few cans of warm Stella. I did get to watch a couple of hours of the hard stuff, though, through a gap in the curtains. It was a rather messy 3-way, and I'm never going to sit on that couch in the pub again.

PS: 'The Cockwell Inn' cider is supposed to be really good. Fnarr fnarr...

Celebrity Diet Book

2007-01-24T14:54:00.000Z

Found this on 'The Onion' site a while back. It sure beats the Atkins diet.

Lee Marvin

2007-01-10T15:59:00.000Z

An apocalyptic new year to all...

2007-01-02T15:43:00.000Z

Well that's all clear then. This came through my door the other day. Actually it all sounds rather exciting. Can't wait for the movie.

Butlins

2006-12-19T16:08:00.000Z

Minehead

2006-12-14T14:51:00.000Z

Here are some very blurry pics of the weekend, starting with The Stooges. Please note that the photographer was seriously out of it most of the time, and it's a wonder anything came out at all. Comets On Fire were my high point of the event:

While the low point must be the No Neck Blues Band...

...who were complete toss, in spite of the fact that the singer spent half the set topless. At one point a fire alarm went off in the venue and everyone thought it was part of the music.

Gozu

2006-11-30T15:56:00.000Z

Finally got to see this the other night on Film 4, from Ichi director Takashi Miike, and it's absolutely effing nuts. Half porno Carry on Yakuza, half body-horror Twin Peaks, it also has one of the most sphincter-clenching death scenes I've ever experienced. Recommended.

San Francisco 1998

2006-11-27T15:39:00.000Z

Beermats

2006-11-21T02:33:00.000Z

For use with Hoffmeister, no doubt.

Let them eat crack...

2006-11-11T17:25:00.000Z

Well no wonder kids are so hyperactive these days. Actually, they are quite tasty. Hope I'm not developing a habit. All together now: 'I'm living on coco rocks!'

Blue Soap

2006-11-08T14:47:00.000Z

How's this for bargain of the year. Fourth Draw Down and Sulk, 2 of the best albums of the eighties in a box with loads of extra tracks for £6 in Fopp, or whatever it's called. I have both of these on vinyl, buthaven'tt listened to them for years. Completely forgotten how murky andclaustrophobicc they are, which I mean in a good way. I really dig The Glamour Chase as well, but the production is much more bright and shiny, while these sound like they were recorded in a partially flooded basement in winter. They sound damp and chilly, which I mean in a good way.

Interestingly I was listening to these last night in a herbal stupor while watching Shaolin Soccer with the sound turned down. It actually worked rather better than you might think. At one point a mass street-dancing scene was perfectly insynchc with Message Oblique Speech. Shaolin Soccer, by the way, is an absolutely great drugs movie.

The horror, the horror...

2006-10-29T15:28:00.000Z

1. Reanimator
2. It's Alive
3. Brain Damage "Looks like you've got a real monster in there!"
4. Blade 2. When will I, will I be famous?
5. Quatermass and the Pit

2006-10-29T15:24:00.000Z

6. Alligator People. Never actually seen this, but it's a great picture.

7. They Live

8. Night of the Demon. Or Curse of the Demon it was also called.

9. Eyes Without a Face. Absolutely nothing to do with Billy Idol.

10. Cat People. Nasty Kinki's finest hour. Shame on you for not getting it.

OK, kids, tis that time of year, and anything Dom can do I can do more ineptly. As before this ain't a top 10, I just like the pictures. Beat me and you can win a night out in a Hackney housing estate with the crack-whore of your choice. Now there's an incentive.

Spooky Cats

2006-10-18T01:37:00.000+01:00

Fear and loathing in Hackney

2006-10-13T16:34:00.000+01:00

This is a crap comic

2006-10-03T15:53:00.000+01:00

Every once in a while I will be visiting a comic shop and decide, perhaps a little stoned, to take a chance on some first issue that catches my eye. You never know, you might be pleasantly surprised, or it could be worth something in a couple of years. But this is rubbish, and no amount of drugs can make it better. The 'story' as such is that some bunch of pumped-up trans-dimensional super-beings in stupid outfits turn up and fight another bunch of same, while shouting things like 'Only oblivion, Joanna, only death!'. And, er... that's it. Really. I don't know who any of them are, and I don't care. One chick even turns up in a pair of see-through pink panties.
I mean isn't that a little impractical when fighting trans-dimensional super-beings, or am I missing something? Perhaps it's a diversionary strategy. This bit did make me laugh;

Though it hardly justifies the couple of quid I spent on this nonsense. Warning, kids: dope and shopping don't mix!

Camden Lock, last week.

2006-09-26T01:23:00.000+01:00

My start as an ebay mogul

2006-09-22T18:28:00.000+01:00

Due to the need to reduce some of the clutter in my life, and hopefully make some money, I am now putting putting stuff on ebay. It's mostly recent comics at the moment, because they're top of the pile, but I shall be adding older comics, books, cds, vinyl, and other assorted crap in the future. Will be adding things every couple of days. You can find it all here.

More alien porn

2006-09-15T15:27:00.000+01:00

The fossilised erection of a behemoth in Lake Mono, I think it was called, California.

Flying Nurses

2006-09-10T15:35:00.000+01:00

Found this while sorting through some old comics. Charlton 1963. Writer and artist uncredited, unfortunately.

My road last night

2006-09-07T01:48:00.000+01:00

2 Fast 2 Furious

2006-09-07T01:40:00.000+01:00

2 Shit 4 Words.

The view from my room

2006-09-05T02:01:00.000+01:00

The End of an Earache

2006-08-30T14:51:00.000+01:00

Sad news this week. It seems that the Intrepid Fox, possibly the longest running alternative/rawk pub in London, is set to close. On September 11, which has a certain tragic irony about it. I've been going in there off and on since the early eighties when it was very punk and much rougher. These days I frequent it less, since it was featured in some Euro Rough Guide to London, and is now filled with dreadlocked Spanish children who think it's cool to skin up at the back, and moronic Scandinavian hair-metallers. But it still feels like a bit of history going, and is sad. Another piece of the seedy old Soho erased and turned into more fuckin yuppie flats. The closing party is on Sept 9, and should be some event.
And while we're on the subject, the're trying to do exactly the same thing to the Astoria, the bastards. Sign the petition to save it here: http://www.petitiononline.com/savethea/petition.html

10 Top Psychos

2006-08-24T14:46:00.000+01:00

Dirty Harry. Andrew Robinson shows us how it's done as Scorpio.
Exorcist 3. Brad Dourif is the Gemini killer. Now it only occurred to me when I saw these 2 pics together: Curly blond hair, nasal strips and zodiac tags - do you think Blatty was attempting an homage here?
The Hitcher. Rutger Hauer.
Battle Royale. 'The one who signed up for fun.' Surely J-rock's answer to Sid Vicious
Ghosts of Mars. Low on extras, and short on cash, John Carpenter visits the local Black Metal club and hires the first person he sees. "Don't worry," says Carp, "All you have to do do is shout 'GRRRAH...WAAARGHHH!!!!!' and wave a severed head around." Which is pretty much what he had planned anyway.

2006-08-24T14:24:00.000+01:00

Ichi the Killer. Tadanobu AsanoBrotherhood of the Wolf. Vincent Cassel. Just an ace baddie. Expert shot and martial arts skills, check. Control over huge mutant dog-thing, check. Hideously deformed arm/claw, check. Incestuous relationship with sister, check. Oh I want to be him.
M. Peter Lorre
Cohen and Tate. Adam Baldwin goes over the top, and stays there.
A History of Violence. Ed Harris.

At long last blogger has allowed me to upload pictures, and seeing as everyone else is doing these quizzes I thought I'd give it a go. Here are 10 special sociopaths, not my top ten (Dennis in Blue Velvet would be a bit too easy), just ten I'm fond of. Some of the actors names I don't know myself, and since I can't be fucked to research it, just the film will do in those cases. Name that loon!

Bloggered Around

2006-08-22T15:32:00.000+01:00

Well I've been trying to do a post, but I can't upload any images at the moment. It crashes my web browser every time I try. Anybody else having problems? Guess I'll try later.

The Stars, My Arse!

2006-08-14T17:20:00.000+01:00

The Warthog Enclosure

2006-08-10T01:27:00.000+01:00

I was cycling along the Regent's Canal today and stopped for a fag, as I often do, on a bench that faces the warthog enclosure in London Zoo. There is a boy warthog and a girl warthog. He was feeling randy, or bored. It's a pretty boring enclosure. So they headbutt each other for a bit, which for a warthog I have noticed seems to be the only form of social interaction, but then their heads do take up most of their mass, so they can't have much choice. He headbutts her into some kind of ritual submission, then tries to mount her. She ain't interested, walks off. He tries to mount her again so she sideswipes him with her tusks. Girl warthogs have tusks as big as boys. He gets the message and pretends he wasn't interested in the first place.

Now where have I seen that before?

Well, that's my day.

6 Irritating Things In Films

2006-08-07T14:47:00.000+01:00

Inappropriate behavior when chased by psycho/monster. We've been over this before. Personally I never tire of seeing stupid young people die in creative ways. There are too many instances to list, but here's a few pointers to the screenwriters of the inevitable 'Wolf Creek 2': A) OK, you're traumatized, but only a complete tit would leave a high-powered rifle next to an unconscious psycho. Even if it's not loaded you can smash his skull in with it, or just hide it. B) You are lost in the outback, but at least you have a big truck. Then, quite rationally, you push it off a cliff, and C) you spend half an hour watching frickin home movies.
'Let's split up.' This is essentially the same as above, but is particularly annoying. Even frickin gazelles know it's safer to stick together, so what do you do when hunted by psycho/monster? Wander off pointlessly in different directions thus making it much easier to be picked off one by one. Memo to the entire cast of Alien 3: You are idiots, and deserved to die.
War films. Never talk to your buddies about your girl/wife/kids/dog back home, let alone show them a picture. You will die in the next scene.
Spooky kids. Is it just me, or are you sick of cute wide-eyed children who wander around films seeing things that adults can't, like dead people, strange lights in the forest, or aliens in the cornfield. Shouldn't they be in school, anyway? Any form of Alien Abduction thingy will inevitably involve one of these little sods. Also, M. Night Shayamaian: you are guilty!
'Try and get some sleep.' Or 'Try and get some rest'. Usually said by alpha male to girl in time of extreme stress, when her adrenalin levels are going batshit. Patronizing bastard.
Err... that's it. But I'm sure I will think of more.

Bugman

2006-07-30T15:31:00.000+01:00

Evening Standard 10 July 2006

2006-07-26T14:00:00.000+01:00

Red Skull

2006-07-22T15:31:00.000+01:00

In anticipation of Dom's supervillain list I chanced upon this on the net. No idea where it's from.
Now in those days villains looked properly villianous. I always felt a bit sorry for the Red Skull. When you look like that there can't be many career options available to you. Social work is going to be out of the question, and I guess you're inevitably going to drift into extreme occult Naziism.

Here's tha Man hangin' with his homies.

Big Twat Week

2006-07-18T15:43:00.000+01:00

As a further example of feline stupidty, following Spike's decision that the spin-dryer was a safe place to shelter from the apocylypse, Bat has come the conclusion that the best thing to do in a heatwave is sit inside a plastic bag. You figure. They wouldn't last five minutes on the savannah.

sunstones

2006-07-13T14:37:00.000+01:00

To all of you who just typed 'sunset', 'standing stones' and 'vagina' into your search engine, welcome! Actually Kek already posted this a while back, after I sent it to him as a birthday card, but here it is again because:

It provides an interesting counterpoint to the previous post.
There are not enough pictures of vaginas on the net.
I like it. Think would make a good book/CD cover.

The Stars My Degradation

2006-07-05T18:13:00.000+01:00

Was perusing the books in Dalston Oxfam the other day when I came across this very rare work by cult US author Randy Buckstaff. So rare in fact that it could possibly be the only copy in existence. Not only that, but the cover art is by reclusive genius and Chriss Foss disciple Doug Savage. I'm gonna stick the sucker on e-bay, but not before I've read it! May publish some extracts, if you're lucky.

Void #2

2006-06-27T02:08:00.000+01:00

Trinity

2006-06-20T14:30:00.000+01:00

I did this montage/collage(?) a very very long time ago, rediscovered it a while back and electronicly rebuggered it. I was a disturbed child, obviously. A proto-Goth. The bodies belonged to the Kray brothers, I seem to remember.

More Alien Porn

2006-06-16T14:46:00.000+01:00

This was inspired by that alien melon thingy I put on a while back.

More Jimbo

2006-06-12T02:29:00.000+01:00

Whip it on, JIM!

2006-06-10T02:41:00.000+01:00

Exclusive still from the new Jams Blunt video.

Soft Pawn

2006-06-07T00:57:00.000+01:00

This took ages ... just for a crap pun. Anyone else out there think I've got too much time on my hands? I need a job, or a girlfriend, or something. Just gone midnight, so I guess Satan's wimped out.

6/6/6 sucks!

2006-06-06T00:50:00.000+01:00

Well, it's been almost an hour, now, I still see no sign of Satan rising from the pit, and reclaiming Earth as his own. Which is a shame. We could do with a regime change. Anyone out there read the Book of Revelations? Wasn't there meant to be a multi-headed hydra, or something? Four horsemen? Well fuck it, then, I'll go to bed. The Whore of Babylon never showed, either.

Stupid Furry Animals

2006-06-05T00:34:00.000+01:00

Spike, bless him, was not first in line when God was handing out the survival genes.
Thinks the spin-dryer is a good place to hide, come Judgment Day (next Teusday). Doh! Now normally I dissapprove of people putting pics of their pets and/or children on sites, but consider this a Puiblic Service Announcement. Don't put pets/children in the spin-dryer. They go all fluffy, and can't walk straight for weeks. Lucky I don't own a microwave.

now that's what I call big hair

2006-06-04T01:09:00.000+01:00

Sorry, Moll, you ain't even in the ballpark. Dom sent me this postcard a while back. Have treasured it ever since.

Stone Room

2006-06-01T14:46:00.000+01:00

I've been teaching myself 3DS Max, and this is an early experiment.